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Poems Info
21.03.2012 (424 days ago )
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TRAYVON MARTIN
Poems By: Umekia Moody

I thought, I thought the days of racism were far behind us

I thought the march all over the south would mean

Days like these were over

I thought we were finally waking up from Dr. Kings Dream

I thought I thought the horrific killing of Emmett Till

Would never be replicated

I thought with Obamas election we had

Finally made it to the mountaintop

I thought it was safe for a young African American

Male to walk the streets at night

Without being deemed suspicious

I thought our justice system would prevail immediately

For a little boy who was just

Going to the store to get his brother some skittles

But my thoughts were in vain

As a innocent life is gone too soon

 

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TRAYVON MARTIN
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  •  Poetic_Heart wrote 211 days ago (positive) 
     
    1
    really like this poem. i think one suggestion I would have to make is in the 1st line that it would actually work better if a dash or ellipses are used to separate both the 'I thought' phrases which know as it stands jar against one another. really like the images that are used after. only critic would have is line; 'Without being deemed suspicious' i think thats a cliche and something else in its place would would be better and make it stronger. the last few lines are great. the hope is gone just as the little boys life is gone.

    hope my feedback helps. Have a great day. God bless.
     
       
     
     
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  •  OpenMicVoices wrote 387 days ago (positive) 
     
    1
    so much thought and history is the undercurrent voice of your work here. Just made me speechless.
     
       
     
     
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  •  Anonymous wrote 424 days ago (positive) 
     
    1
    Powerful imagery. If you break into stanzas/paragraphs your message will become more emphatic. I love this poem. Always sustain hope for change.
     
       
     
     
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